Unwitting victims of war, militancy and other manmade conflicts, widows are condemned to live a life of misery, loneliness and emotional hurt that will probably never heal.

But don't pity them. Empower them as peace-builders, if you can.

The "role of conflict widows in healing a hurting world" was discussed extensively at a three-workshop here that began Monday. It was organised by India Women's United Nations Report Network (UNRN) in which prominent women rights activists, diplomats and scholars, including V Mohini Giri, Dr Kapila Vatsyayan, Syeda Imam, Abid Hussain, Swami Agnivesh, Leena Parmar and Girija Dhar participated.  

Meera Khanna of Guild of Service, an NGO, spoke eloquently about the need to involve widows in armed conflicts, wives of the missing and those who are tragic victims of violence in peacekeeping operations.

Despite being the worst sufferers in a situation of conflict, donors, UN agencies and governments tend to view widows exclusively as vulnerable victims of war rather than as crucial economic and social players in reconstruction and key contributors to conflict resolution, prevention and peace building.

But, in reality, their voices are not heard and they are often marginalized or excluded from negotiation or diplomacy aimed at ending armed conflicts. Worse of all, they are considered as inauspicious and are often stigmatized and humiliated by society.

Being victims, widows understand the problems spawned by conflicts, civil, military or communal best, argued panellists.

If you aren't convinced, take a hard look at the grim statistics. Approximately, 80 per cent of today's civilian casualties are women and 80 per cent of all refugees and internally displaced people worldwide are women and children.

In Gujarat, Punjab and Jammu and Kashmir, riots and militancy spawned countless number of widows. There are no exact statistics to capture the scale of upheaval wrought in the lives of widows in these states. 

In Sri Lanka, some 55,000 women were widowed, and more than 760,000 people internally displaced, 1,000,000 made refugees and nearly a third of affected female headed.

Padma Seth, a former member of the National Commission for Women (NCW), passionately argues for treating the issues related to war widows as a national priority. "Calling a war widow a national hero will not be an exaggeration. The peaceful life that we lead and enjoy are the gifts of her sacrifices and her husband's commitment to the nation."

Ginny Srivastava, in her paper "Peace - with justice: What widows in India can do", identifies feudal patriarchal values as the chief hindrance. "Until the whole society changes the supremacy of patriarchy, many widows will be prevented from playing their roles in peace building and reconciliation," she said.

--Indo-Asian News Service